by Kyle Howard
"All my life I was taught that it was more blessed to give than to receive. The message was so firmly ingrained into my thinking that in time I began to believe it was not blessed to receive, that there was something wrong about being the receiver. I had forgotten or not clearly understood the teaching of King Benjamin [in Mosiah 4:19] that we are all beggars, having received everything from the Lord" (Walter L. Maughan, “The Receiving End of Giving,” Ensign, June 1982, 52).
Many believe that there is something wrong with receiving. This is especially apparent when we observe someone trying to give something to another, and that gift is turned down. They say something like, "Oh, no, don't worry about it. I'm fine.--or--No, I can't take that. You keep it." It is as if they try to give the gift back to the person, thinking that it is much better to be a giver than a receiver. One may say that such refusal is simply showing one's self-proficiency, or that they are simply being polite and modest. They may even think they really don't need what is being offered. But it requires a certain Christ-like quality to be a receiver, and most people are afraid to even attempt to obtain that quality, afraid that it will be mistaken for greed or selfishness.
When one refuses a physical gift, a compliment, or a gift of service, he or she is obviously not performing an act of giving. So what is such a person doing when refusing a gift? He or she is not giving nor receiving, but "taking." They are unconsciously taking away an opportunity for the other person to serve. They are not the only takers; people who do accept gifts but do not return any form of gratitude are also takers. So what's the difference between a taker and a receiver?
Christ showed us an example of being a receiver rather than a taker: "And being in Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as [Jesus] sat at meat, there came a woman having an alabaster box of ointment of spikenard very precious; and poured it on his head. And there were some that had indignation within themselves, and said, Why was this waste of the ointment made? For it might have been sold for more than three hundred pence, and have been given to the poor. And they murmured against her. And Jesus said, Let her alone; why trouble ye her? she hath wrought a good work on me" (Mark 14:3-6). I ponder on this scripture and realize that Christ never refused others' gifts or services, but accepted them with great gratitude and love for the giver, no matter how great or how little worth the gift had.
So what's the difference between a "taker" and a "receiver?"
A taker does simply that: takes. He or she takes a gift without expressing gratitude, takes a compliment and throws it back with a "No, I'm not that good." He or she takes away another's opportunity of service and giving by refusing a gift.
A receiver receives the gift, always with thanksgiving and much gratitude to the giver, letting them know how thoughtful and kind they are for giving such a wonderful gift and expressing love in return. A receiver receives a compliment with a sincere "Thank you. I appreciate that." They return a boost of spirits and worth back to the giver. A receiver allows others to serve him or her, to give others an opportunity to express their love by giving.
Which are you? a "taker" or a "receiver?"
For every giver, there must be a receiver, and for every receiver, there must be a giver. One cannot exist without the other. So give and give and give, and receive with thanksgiving every gift given to you. For in this is joy and love, and all are edified.
"And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more" (D&C 78:19).
May we all be givers and receivers.
"All my life I was taught that it was more blessed to give than to receive. The message was so firmly ingrained into my thinking that in time I began to believe it was not blessed to receive, that there was something wrong about being the receiver. I had forgotten or not clearly understood the teaching of King Benjamin [in Mosiah 4:19] that we are all beggars, having received everything from the Lord" (Walter L. Maughan, “The Receiving End of Giving,” Ensign, June 1982, 52).
Many believe that there is something wrong with receiving. This is especially apparent when we observe someone trying to give something to another, and that gift is turned down. They say something like, "Oh, no, don't worry about it. I'm fine.--or--No, I can't take that. You keep it." It is as if they try to give the gift back to the person, thinking that it is much better to be a giver than a receiver. One may say that such refusal is simply showing one's self-proficiency, or that they are simply being polite and modest. They may even think they really don't need what is being offered. But it requires a certain Christ-like quality to be a receiver, and most people are afraid to even attempt to obtain that quality, afraid that it will be mistaken for greed or selfishness.
When one refuses a physical gift, a compliment, or a gift of service, he or she is obviously not performing an act of giving. So what is such a person doing when refusing a gift? He or she is not giving nor receiving, but "taking." They are unconsciously taking away an opportunity for the other person to serve. They are not the only takers; people who do accept gifts but do not return any form of gratitude are also takers. So what's the difference between a taker and a receiver?
Christ showed us an example of being a receiver rather than a taker: "And being in Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as [Jesus] sat at meat, there came a woman having an alabaster box of ointment of spikenard very precious; and poured it on his head. And there were some that had indignation within themselves, and said, Why was this waste of the ointment made? For it might have been sold for more than three hundred pence, and have been given to the poor. And they murmured against her. And Jesus said, Let her alone; why trouble ye her? she hath wrought a good work on me" (Mark 14:3-6). I ponder on this scripture and realize that Christ never refused others' gifts or services, but accepted them with great gratitude and love for the giver, no matter how great or how little worth the gift had.
So what's the difference between a "taker" and a "receiver?"
A taker does simply that: takes. He or she takes a gift without expressing gratitude, takes a compliment and throws it back with a "No, I'm not that good." He or she takes away another's opportunity of service and giving by refusing a gift.
A receiver receives the gift, always with thanksgiving and much gratitude to the giver, letting them know how thoughtful and kind they are for giving such a wonderful gift and expressing love in return. A receiver receives a compliment with a sincere "Thank you. I appreciate that." They return a boost of spirits and worth back to the giver. A receiver allows others to serve him or her, to give others an opportunity to express their love by giving.
Which are you? a "taker" or a "receiver?"
For every giver, there must be a receiver, and for every receiver, there must be a giver. One cannot exist without the other. So give and give and give, and receive with thanksgiving every gift given to you. For in this is joy and love, and all are edified.
"And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more" (D&C 78:19).
May we all be givers and receivers.
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